What Is The Term For Parents Who Are Controlling, Punitive, Rigid, Cold, And Whose Word Is Law?

Which blazon of parents produce amend kids? Strict parents or lenient parents? Many parents grapple with what type of parenting and discipline to use. It often boils down to strict or lenient.

Permit's find out what strict parenting is and how information technology can affect a child's development.

Why Are Parents Strict

Parents are strict for various reasons, some skillful and some self-serving. Some strict parents accept high expectations. They teach their children self-subject area by property them accountable. These parents have their kids' best interests at eye.

But some strict parents are controlling because they fright being seen every bit incompetent parents if their children make mistakes. Such parents are more than concerned about their own feelings and insecurity than their children'due south well-being.

Virtually strict parents justify their choice of parenting style using the either-or parenting rationale. They don't want to heighten defiant kids, and lenient parenting is often believed to cause defiance in children. So they turn to strict parenting. They believe that ane tin can only be either permissive parents or strict parents. There's aught in-between.

Their sentiments usually include a combination of the following.

"I don't let my kids walk all over me."
"I want well-behaved children."
"I don't want to raise unruly kids."
"My child needs me to be a parent, not a friend."
"I don't want my kids to terminate up in jail."
Etc.

girl sits on couch in front of a strict parent

What Are Strict Parents (Pregnant & Definition)

In psychology, strict parents are divers as parents who place high standards and demands on their children. They can be administrative or authoritarian, depending on the parents' disciplinary beliefs and responsiveness to their child'south needs ¹ .

When parents couple high standards with warm and responsive back up to their children, they are authoritative parents.

Despite setting high standards, authoritative parents value independent thinking. They allow children to challenge their rules or provide feedback. Administrative parenting generally produces the best outcomes in kids.

Unfortunately, virtually strict parents are not authoritative.

Most strict parents are cold, unresponsive, and unsupportive to their children. Their rules are oft overly strict and arbitrary.

These parents don't permit their children to voice their opinions or question the parents' decisions. They are controlling parents practicing the authoritarian parenting manner, which generates worse outcomes than the authoritative fashion.

why are strick parents strict mom points finger at son who covers his ears make sure he does his homework

Are Strict Parents Skilful or Bad

While strict and responsive parenting way (authoritative) produces the best outcomes in children, strict and unresponsive parenting style (authoritarian) produces adverse outcomes including behavior problems, low self-esteem, self-command issues, and mental health problems.

When people speak about strict parenting, they generally refer to the authoritarian type.

In the residuum of this commodity, we volition focus on the authoritarian blazon and its detrimental bear on on children.

What Are The Signs of Strict Parents

Strict parents are the ones who

have many strict rules and are demanding
demand their child to attach blindly to their expectations
do non permit questioning parental authority
punish severely for violation of whatever rules
common cold, unresponsive to their kids
use shaming and harsh words

strict mother points finger at boy no video games

Effects of Strict Parenting

So what happens when parents are as well strict?

These parents view bookish success as a priority and estimate the effectiveness of their parenting by their children'due south performance in schoolhouse. This type of parenting tin outcome in high academic performance in some cultures such as in many Asian countries.

However, despite the apparent academic success in some cultures, this parenting style too results in many amercement in the children ² .

Kids raised with strict parenting are more likely to be unhappy and suffer from depression

Studies show that kids raised in a strict household tend to be unhappy ³ and evidence more depressive symptoms ^4–6 .

In some countries, such equally Hong Kong ^vii and Australia ⁸ , kids raised in strict households are more prone to suicidal attempts or ideation.

Kids raised with strict discipline tend to have antisocial behavioral bug such as rebellion, acrimony, aggression and delinquency

Although some parents think that strict parenting produces better-behaved kids, studies testify that such a parenting style actually produces kids that have more behavioral problems.

Kids acquire what they alive and what their parents model. When parents discipline their kids with castigating emotions, strength, threat, verbal and harsh punishments, they model how to react punitively when they're upset.

As a event, the children have learned to become more rebellious, aroused ⁹ , impulsive and ambitious when things don't become their fashion ¹⁰ (and therefore get punished even more!) These kids are also more likely to engage in risky behavior such as running away ¹¹ .

strict parents rules push boy to be rebellious and shouts

Strict parents turn their kids into sneaky actors and liars

Strict parents expect unquestionable obedience, conformity, and respect for authority, which are ordinarily obtained with harsh subject area. As a result, super strict parents create a sneaky child. These children have learned to go good actors. They behave well at dwelling house but deed differently when the parents are not around.

Because the parents do non provide a safe environs for the kids, to tell the truth, kids raised with strict rules are adept at lying and hiding things so they don't get in trouble.

Strict parenting curtails motivation in their kids

Strict moms and dads choose extracurricular activities, class schedules, and social events for their children with no input from them at all.

However, autonomy is an innate homo want ^12,xiii . Strict parents stripping children of their autonomy causes these kids to exist more rebellious and unmotivated as teenagers and immature adults ¹⁴ .

Imposing external incentives such as threats of punishment creates extrinsic motivation while decreasing intrinsic motivation. Kids raised with Callous rules not but are more than rebellious just besides evidence low initiatives ¹⁵ .

Authoritarian parents heighten bullies

Authoritarian parenting elicits compliance using fears. When kids do what others want out of fearfulness, that makes upward bullying. These children learn to employ forcefulness and power over others to get what they want.

Studies have shown that children of disciplinarian parents are more likely to become bullies or friends of bullies ¹⁶ .

Children raised with strict rules lack self-esteem and conviction to make decisions

Inquiry shows that female person adolescents with authoritarian parents are less capable to decide when given the opportunity ¹⁷ .

Having strict parents mean these children are used to being told what to practise. They lack cocky-esteem and self-confidence ¹⁸ to make up one's mind and worry near making the incorrect option.

Kids raised with punitive discipline suffer from inflexible thinking, resulting in worse mental wellbeing

Psychological flexibility is crucial to daily well-being and lasting psychological health. To become competent and healthy adults, children demand to develop skills that let flexible thinking inside complex social environments ^19,20 .

Parents with rigid rules impose high levels of intrusive psychological and behavioral command on their kids. These kids have less psychological flexibility and more maladaptive self-regulation in after adolescence.

Lack of psychological flexibility and emotional regulation skills are both highly associated with the development of mental disorders ²¹ .

Likewise depression, this type of parenting is highly associated with mental disorders including General Anxiety Disorder (GED)22, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) ²² , dissociation, cocky-harm ²³ , drug use, and alcohol abuse ²⁴ .

Kids raised by controlling parents accept twisted behavior of authority

Decision-making parents who human action like dictators instill a twisted belief of authority in kids. They utilize unilateral advice and establish rules without explanation and expect their children to obey without complaint or question.

On one hand, some children larn that ability is always correct. They demand to obey and don't question authority when they should. These kids internalize a need to "follow the rules at all cost." This belief tin can prepare them up for dangerous situations where they can be taken advantage of by authorisation figures abusing their power.

Some children take developed distrust, hostility, and resistance to government such as school or police. Kids raised in controlling homes view parental legitimacy negatively, and this view tin cause delinquency ²⁵ .

Kids raised with authoritarian parenting tend to have more than peer rejection and future relationship problems, especially in romantic relationships

Children in very strict households are less emotionally regulated and have worse social skills ²⁶ . They as well pause more than engagement and accept unsatisfactory affairs in adulthood.

Final Thoughts On Strict Parents

Perhaps the virtually dissentious event of strict parenting is the strain it puts on the parent-child relationship, every bit no one likes to exist controlled.

If you're a strict parent, it'south worth it to think of what your child-raising goal is. The bottom line is – what is your vision of your relationship 20 years from now? Do you want your kid to visit you, talk to you, or answer your phone calls when they abound up? Do y'all want them to still be in your life?

If you accept very controlling parents, y'all probably take a lot of healing to do. Seeking professional person assistance to back up you lot through this healing journey is a skilful idea. Psychologists can help you figure out how to deal with strict parents. You don't have to do it alone.

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